Green N' Vulcan
by Sakura Aloni
Summary: Spock's not White N' Nerdy, he's Green N' Vulcan


Summary: Watching a video on YouTube where someone used Weird Al's _White n' Nerdy_ for Spock, the little muse in my head told me to rewrite it to better fit Spock, so…I did. Put it together in about an hour so it's probably not very good.

Disclaimer: I don't own Star Trek or Spock, they belong to good ol' Gene Roddenberry, _White N' Nerdy_ belongs to Weird Al, so I don't own that either.

A/N: I went back and fixed a couple of typo's and added page breaks so it looks a little cleaner. I know I made a referense to the new movie so its technically an AOS crossover but its from Spock!Prime's POV so it could count as TOS

* * *

They see me doin'  
My greeting  
I know they're all thinking  
I'm so green n' Vulcan

Think I'm just too green n' Vulcan  
Think I'm just too green n' Vulcan  
Can't you see I'm green n' Vulcan  
Look at me I'm green n' Vulcan!  
I wanna roll with  
The humans  
But so far they all think  
I'm too green n' Vulcan  
Think I'm just too green n' Vulcan  
Think I'm just too green n' Vulcan  
I'm just too green n' Vulcan  
Really, really green n' Vulcan

First in my class here at S.F.A.  
Got skills, I'm a Champion of 3-D Chess  
T'Penna that's my favorite MC  
Keep your bourbon  
I'll just have Vulcan spice tea  
My lips never smile to the contrary  
You'll find they're quite stationary  
Both of my ears are really pointy  
Only Surak in my library  
My laboratory's all totally pimped out  
I got experiments everywhere  
Yo I know Pi to a thousand places  
My heart is where a human's kidney is.  
I only order things like fruits and vegetables  
I'm a whiz at mediation I can stay for days  
Once you see me at it you're gonna freak out,  
I'm sittin so still it's like I'm a statue  
Born in the city of Shi'Kahr  
With Jim Kirk, well, I'm his Number 1  
Do vector calculus just for fun  
I ain't got a gat but I gotta phaser gun  
Vulcan lute is my favorite instrument  
I can sure kick your butt when I'm in the _plak-tow_  
I'll ace any trivia quiz you bring on  
I'm fluent in Vulcan as well as Standard  
Here's the part I sing on

They hear me talkin' 'bout logic!  
I know in my heart they think I'm  
green n' Vulcan!  
Think I'm just too green n' Vulcan  
Think I'm just too green n' Vulcan  
Can't you see I'm green n' Vulcan  
Look at me I'm green n' Vulcan  
I'd like to roll with  
The humans  
Although it's apparent I'm too

Green n' Vulcan  
Think I'm just too green n' Vulcan  
I'm just too green n' Vulcan  
How'd I get so green n' Vulcan?

You know my mom's human  
Of course her name is Amanda Grayson  
My dad's name is Sarek  
An Ambassador  
goading Leonard McCoy never leaves me bored  
loosin control cause of some weird space pollen  
I have two eyelids  
I have had my brain stolen from me before  
I gave my _katra_ to Doctor McCoy and he went kind of bonkers  
I tried to go through_ kolinar_  
I've gotta older half-bro named Sybok  
He does not follow the Vulcan ways  
Had a couple of mind melds with Jim Kirk!  
Yo! Got myself a tricorder  
Got pulled into an alternate timeline  
Watched Vulcan get sucked into a black hole

Pinch pinch! And now you are so unconscious!

I'm nerdy in the extreme and greener than guacamole  
I was bonded to T'Pring but turns out she didn't want me  
Only question I ever thought was hard  
Was do I like Jim or do I like Leonard? (Who am I kidding? It's totally Leo)  
I spend every weekend  
on a different planet  
I got a meditation robe!

They see me strollin'  
They laughin'  
And rollin' their eyes 'cause  
I'm so green n' Vulcan  
Just because I'm green n' Vulcan  
Just because I'm green n' Vulcan  
All because I'm green n' Vulcan  
Holy cow I'm green n' Vulcan  
I wanna bowl with  
the humans  
but oh well it's obvious I'm  
green n' Vulcan  
Think I'm just too green n' Vulcan  
Think I'm just too green n' Vulcan  
I'm just too green n' Vulcan  
Look at me I'm green n' Vulcan!

* * *

A/N: S.T.A. = Star Fleet Academy

T'Penna - opera star that performed a Terran opera [VOY The Swarm]

Yes, the line asking himself if he like Jim or Leonard better _is_ a nod to all the Trek slashers out there. Its Spones all the way for me!


End file.
